My first STD was from a foam party
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
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