Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
