If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
