He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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