I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
