okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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