Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Randomize
