At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize