Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize