I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize