i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize