How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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