glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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