So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize