I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
