She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
