Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
My balls are so social today.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
