Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
