I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
