Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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