According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
