Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
