perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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