your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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