Your tits are I can't wait for
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
