and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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