ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
