Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize