hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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