life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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