That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Randomize
