You work out of a Hotel?
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize