She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
