Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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