who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
