what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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