I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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