TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize