so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
