Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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