i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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