jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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