so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
