The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Randomize
