no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
You made me cry and you don't even care
how can u be prego again
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
