I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
