Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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