best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
now i know why i became what i already was.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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