know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
