dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
