yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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